What makes someone to captivate us?
I was thinking about it and discussing it with my friend on the phone.
For me it happens when I discover something in the very essence of the person that conquers me
and makes me feel that the way this person thinks and does things will always have my admiration.
And it makes me feel like I can accept this person entirely, with all the imperfections we all have.
For me this is the basis and other things come inevitably like desire, physical attraction, love.
It’s possible to find other interesting people and allow myself to have good moments with them.
But I know what captivation means. It’s very powerful. It speaks in silence and inaction.
But sometimes this captivation happens only in one side, or the other has some issues that are not up to me to solve or don’t concern to me directly.
This friend I was talking to knows me a lot and she thinks I do too much mental processing about it.
I think she may be right. She herself admits to do it a lot with her issues too.
Despite of being aware of the feeling I have I should treat this matter in a practical way like I do in other situations with other interesting people I mentioned. Consider what is done or said for real only and stop thinking of what can be behind something not clearly and undoubtedly spoken or done.
It’s much easier when I’m not that much into the other side. Things flow easily.
I agree with her that most of people don’t spend time with all this mental processing like we do and deal with this matters, already complex by nature, in a more practical way.
I don’t wanna stop this mental processing. I just need to control it more and develop this practical dealing with things and situations better.
But one thing is true: we all search for this captivation feeling and hope it can be mutual. And once you have it, despite of not being mutual, it’s really difficult to let it go.